clementinevonradics:

Please Know: 

Whether it’s the days you burn more brilliant than the sun

Or the nights you collapse into my lap, curling your body
into a thousand broken questions

You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

I will love you when you are a still day.

I will love you when you are a hurricane.

fovelshucker:

TODAY MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER BURNED A DOLLAR IN FRONT OF US BUT HE FORGOT TO TELL US THAT THE DOLLAR WOULDNT BURN ONLY THE ALCOHOL WOULD SO HE TOOK OUT A 100 DOLLAR BILL AND SOAKED IT IN ALCOHOL AND WERE LIKE “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” AND HE CAUGHT IT ON FIRE AND WE ALL YELLED AT HIM BUT THEN IT WENT OUT AND THE BILL WAS FINE AND WE WERE SILENT FOR 20 MINUTES

kristen-wiig:

people say i’m not ambitious but can they marathon an entire tv show in one day????? i didn’t think so

anaisforthewin:

shapeshiftandtrick:

ryan-aniki:

shapeshiftandtrick:

how does one tell a boy that one likes him

I am a boy and have a foolproof plan for this:

1. text them and start playing one of those 20q games
2. if they start being a dodgy fella drop em
3. if they ask “You like anyone?”
    reply Yeah, you.
4. If they give you a negative reply sayin they dont like you back then just correct yourself to “*Yeah, you?”

dude that is genius

slow clappin’ it out.

lorassed:

why the fuck does vagina=weak and dick=strong
have u ever kicked someone in the dick? they fall to the floor and cry
kick someone in the vagina and i can guarantee u they’ll just punch u in the face
vagina not weak
vagina strong

ninja-ash:

im sorry but why is no one talking about this movie?

its about a guy named Pistachio Disguisey who has to dress up in disguises to defeat an evil organisation

he literally dressed up as a turtle man to join the ‘turtle club’

and he dressed in drag as sassy Gammy Num Nums

wHAT

IS

EVEN

HAPPENING

FOR GODS SAKE HE DRESSED UP AS COW SHIT THIS IS THE WORST AND BEST FILM EVER MADE

Dana Carvey is the man